bittersweet solitude of a fireflower

It’s like, I don’t know, I’m feeling dumb and stupid all of the sudden. And then I realize that this is not I want or wish for, but I no longer know how to get out of it. Or grow out of it.

And I feel guilty. I feel sad. I feel useless. I feel ignorant, like a fool who chooses to tread onto unknown land so foolishly.

I hate this. I hate how things are. I hate things may be. I hate how things will be.

Maybe… I’m just not cut out for all this after all.